NOTHING. I miss absolutely nothing.
TOP 10 THINGS I DON'T MISS...
Embarrassment: The flashbacks of being being too loud, too wild, slurring, being the only one still going that far.
Guilt: Not remembering things that my children were reminiscing about the next morning. Knowing I hurt and/or embarrassed my husband with my actions.
Hangovers: The headaches, bloodshot eyes, waxy complexion and worst of all - the nausea.
Blackouts: Waking up and not remembering anything from the night before. Did I make a fool out of myself? Did I hurt anyone? Did I hide the bottle? Which led to…
Depression & Anxiety: I was on anti-depressants for over a year, and my severe anxiety lead to impatience, mood swings, and panic attacks.
False Security & Reality: Alcohol was an acceptable coping mechanism and I could get through anything with it. It made me more fun, relaxed, likable, and helped me to be more outgoing. I didn’t have to like myself or know who I actually was.
Dependency: “Knowing” I couldn’t get through an evening, social setting, or day without it.
Worry: Constantly fixating on not having enough to drink. Would there be alcohol there? Can I order a second drink? A third drink? Do I have enough in the house? What if I run out?
Missing Out: Being so obsessed with drinking that I would rather stay home than go out or go to a friends’. I definitely couldn’t commit to morning activities with my family that would hinder the prior evening of over-indulgence. I missed out on being fully present.
Fear: Living day to day knowing that I had a problem but not wanting to fix it because I was too scared to be sober. I was too scared to get to know the person I was without alcohol.
I lived my life for far too many years under the influence of alcohol. Even when I was sober, it ruled my life. I can honestly say that I do not miss having alcohol in my life. So, I will continue to take it one day at a time being mindful, present, and at peace.

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